95 Piccadilly
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About two weeks ago, I did the unthinkable: I downloaded TikTok. After months of friends insisting, cajoling, threatening, and guilt-tripping, I finally caved. I’ve yet to decide whether that was a good thing. I needed another social media account like I need a hole in the head, but here we are, like a moth to the flame, scrolling in a massive digital labyrinth that somehow feels designed to keep me glued to yet another screen.
And yet…there’s equally a strange allure. Over time, I can see how TikTok might feed the creative side of my brain. It’s a platform that allows the person – in this case, me – who once dreamed of being a newscaster, the person who wanted to make documentaries and explore countless realities, to live that dream, so long as he does it in 30-second intervals. There’s something oddly satisfying about living so condensed, something that challenges the imagination. It’s like a shot in the dark.
So far, my forays into TikTok have been modest. My “greatest achievement,” if you can call it that, is posting a video of fitness trainer Jillian Michaels yelling at a contestant on The Biggest Loser. I posted it fully aware that I once said Jillian was terrifying, but now I’ve decided I need her to accompany me to the gym. I’ve been a little lazy lately. Maybe it’s time to get off TikTok and get on a treadmill, with Jillian’s voice echoing in my head, like a motivational drill sergeant I never knew I needed.
It’s fascinating, isn’t it, how a platform often criticized as a vortex of time-wasting nonsense – or worse – can also feel like a window into possibility? It surprises me. In just a fortnight, I’ve seen people remix history, turn cooking into high art, dance the evening news, raise monkeys, teach languages, demonstrate life hacks, and conduct science experiments. It’s like a masterclass for the Average Joe, constantly challenging your assumptions about the world around us, all from the comfort of your phone.
Of course, there’s the other side: the dreaded risk of the perpetual scroll, a hypnotic loop of content tailored perfectly to your attention span and your algorithm, and the sudden realization that you’ve spent 45 minutes watching horse videos while debating the merits of 90s pop culture, with the Goo Goo Dolls providing the soundtrack. Iris, anyone? Am I sucked in? Probably. Is it irreversible? Maybe. For certain, it’s a strange mixture of amusement, fascination, and, oddly enough, inspiration, and even that, in a weird way, has its charm, doesn’t it? LIE TO ME!
So here I am, two weeks in, questioning whether TikTok is a blessing or a curse, and I’ve learned one thing for sure, if I’m going to survive this vortex, I’ll need Jillian Michaels in my corner, screaming at me to move, to push, to get off my phone – and perhaps, in the process, reminding me why I downloaded the app in the first place. (Help! Jillian, call me!)